Eyes

“The eyes are the windows to the soul.” Eye contact is how an individual views others, and how the individual is viewed. A sense of connectedness occurs through eye contact. It is the initial step in striking up a conversation. One of the most amazing roles our eyes have is in flirtation (Hybels & Weaver p.146).

Eye contact can also be taken the wrong way. Aside from cultural differences that we need to be cognizant of, there are social rules that we must follow in order to remain non-threatening and socially acceptable. Staring, for example, is taken negatively if done for too long. The one being stared at may feel threatened or uncomfortable, possibly even violated in a way. Staring is also often used to register disapproval of the behavior of another (Townsend p. 105).  When I was a little girl, I loved to play in the clothing racks at K-Mart. But when I went with my grandmother, she didn’t like it so much, and when I caught a glimpse of her staring at me, I knew I was in trouble. She didn’t have to say a word, and it was even worse if she raised her eyebrow.

Another form of eye contact is gazing into someone’s eyes. This arouses strong emotions. I know this to be true as well, from my own personal experiences with my future husband. If one or both viewers feel the urge to look away, it usually occurs after about 3 seconds. Breaking eye contact lowers stress levels (Townsend p. 106).

In American culture, eye contact shows an interest in the other person, and it indicates that the communication channel is open. It is also a sign of honesty, credibility, warmth, and involvement. Lack of eye contact, not just in the American culture, can indicate disinterest, inattention, rudeness, shyness, deception, and disrespect (Hybels & Weaver p. 146). In other cultures however; eye contact can be intimidating and disrespectful. Many Asians and Pacific Islanders believe that young people should never make eye contact with their elders (Hybels & Weaver p. 146). In African countries, it is unacceptable to look into the eyes of a prominent figure (Hybels & Weaver p. 146).

Word Count: 367

Works Cited:

Hybels, Saundra and Richard L. Weaver. Communicating Effectively. 9th ed. New York:            McGraw-Hill,     2009. Print.

Townsend, Mary. Essentials of Psychiatric Mental Health Nursing, 4th ed. Philadelphia:             F.A. Davis, 2009. Print.